I’ve been walking around with some words of the late John Lewis in recent days-words he lived and embodied-that in the space between the world as it is and what we long for it to become, we are called to live “as if” the possibility we aspire to is already present. Our job is to make it more visible, more vivid, more true. Interestingly, mysteriously, when you do this, you begin to see differently. You get oriented to notice tendrils, traces, the new shapes of emergence that

I am reminded of one of my most powerful healing tools that is alway available to me. My ability to circle back when I sense repair is needed in my relationships. One’s tendency to hope that the “the thing” whatever “the thing” may be was not heard, has been forgotten, was not as _______ we can fill in the blank with whatever word lands. This requires self awareness and becomes easier to engage as I’ve been utilizing it more often. I cannot tell you how often when I mention “

Painting by Ginger, Kyle's mom When something shows up three times in mentoring calls with women I’m in conversation with it has piqued my curiosity, grabbed my attention and yearns to be explored. In early loss the only way I knew to learn how to live within it was to compartmentalize. I used the visualization of boxes where I could place my Douglas sorrow into a box. Understanding that it would be there waiting for me when I had the strength to bring it down to poke throug

Relational trust is built on movements of the human heart such as empathy, commitment, compassion, patience, and the capacity to forgive. Parker J. Palmer, The Courage to Teach I have been thinking about trust a lot lately and it’s a wild one to wrestle with much less even try to write a few sentences about. However, I feel it’s something that has guided me through my six decades and is inching me even closer to my seventh decade just a few years away now. To trust is to ris

I hear often about checking in on the ones who appear strong and together on the outside and I am reminded of what I absorbed in the rooms of Al-Anon. I cannot fully comprehend nor understand what is happening within another by observing what they are choosing to present to the outside world. Thank goodness I was raised in a household where my mom had an invisible Xray machine which she relied upon that absolutely without a doubt knew what was going on within my interior by s

Douglas and his sister, Sarah, before prom. (Douglas and his sister, Sarah, before prom.) When one loses a sibling it is the strangest and loneliest feeling that I can describe. A part of a shared history, the one who knew you when no longer exists. Resulting in an earth shattering and jarring jolt to those left behind having to pick up the scattered shards to a puzzle that no longer fits nor are you sure you ever want it to. My brother, Eric, or Rick, as he was known to us